How can i do this!
by jasz
Summary: Edward is pulled out of his misery after a crime he commits. Bella become strong after her deathful experience. An edward bella story.


Hi everyone. This is my first full length story. Please do comment on how it is.

Disclaimer : I donot own twilight or any of it's characters.

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**How can i do this??!!**

BPOV

Ugh! I regret the way I got trapped into this. My friend angela weber, the extravagant was all too joyous of our graduation to throw a party and has successfully coaxed me into coming here. I am not much of a party person. The smokey room blaring with loud music and staggering drunken people are not my thing. My way of enjoyment is subtle and it includes reading of a book under the tree on the sunny day which is quiet so often in phoenix, Arizona.

Well, my name is Bella Swan. I live with my mother alone now after the death of my father last year. He was a cop and got killed in a mob fighting. It was a depressing day for my mom and me when we received the news. Our's was a perfect loving family which all got destroyed after my father's death. He was a fun loving, dutiful person. He gave equal importance to both his job and family. He perfectly balanced them , which I appreciate a lot. He has been there at every step of my life till now and would always be a part of it. I miss him a lot, my mother too but we never show it to each other. We want to be strong for each other. We want to be strength of each other but not look at each other and cry for the loss of the person we love so much.

Ever since his death I have done everything to keep myself out of trouble , to never give a chance of complaint from other's to my mother. She deserves it but not someone complaining about her daughter for whom she is working so hard, she is struggling for. My mother feels I am missing my teenage life but it is not so I am not made up for all these parties. I like my solitude. However it wasn't like I am closed in my room all hours. I am active in my school, I go to ballet classes, and have friends and do socialize a little. It is only that I am careful with whom I mingle with. I don't want to fall in the bad company and later regret it. And I have my best friend angela whom I met in my fourth grade. Her parents moved her that year. His father got a job that paid more than his earlier company and so they moved here. I met her on her first day of school and she readily introduced herself and was very enthusiastic. She was very friendly and finally invited herself to my house. It was great having someone at my house, I never had any good friends to bring home, they were all my classmates but no one close to friends. But she was very social , though we are straight opposite we got well and have been best friends for years. She has taken upon herself to get me a date every prom after I shoved half the male population of the school who asked me the first time. I couldn't help it. I didn't feel good or comfortable with anyone. She calls me prude but maybe there would come a time when I would find my and I would make the first move. Who knows?

"COME ON BELLA. YOU NEED TO LOOSEN UP A LITTLE BIT" she shouted over the music to me. I just nodded smiling at her as she moved to the dance floor with her boyfriend Ben. This party is totally messed now with people all drunk. I can see a group of boys hunched over a table doing shots. Hmm………..they are not from our school might be some of her brother's friend. Angela has a elder brother Tyler who was in college, and it was because of his that her parents has agreed for the party. He assured them of no alcohol but it was totally forgotten now.

I moved through the people to go to the washroom. My friend angela has long back forgotten me. I haven't seen her for a while now. The whole party is now mad now. People drunk and howling. I moved rapidly, I needed to relieve my bladder after the drinks I had. I had a beer not wanting to be more drunk. Angela handed me a drink , the name for which I don't know so I chose to not drink it. Never drink of things u don't know, was what my mom said.

I sighed with relief as I finally reached the washroom. I relieved myself, washed my hands and opened the door when I felt myself pushed back inside, the lights turned off immediately and a hand over my mouth muffling my protest. "Shut up" the voice growled at me. It was authoritative, sending shiver through me. He took the moment to remove his hands from over my mouth as I tried to shout again his hand was now replaced by his lips which were forceful. They were aggressive, his hands moving to my hips grabbing them roughly. I tried to shove his away with my hands. But he was too strong for me, he grabbed my hands and pinned them to my back before plunging back to my mouth. This time I tried to knee him but my motion was again blocked with his knee pressed in between my legs as I was pushed against the wall. All my movements were blocked by him. I bit his tongue as he shoved it forcefully into me. "YOU BITCH" he shouted hitting me on my face. I landed on the floor beside the tub. He crounched over me again attacking my mouth. He pressed my hands forcefully up against the floor and his legs tied with mine. He assaulted me in to my weakness finally getting his way with me. He violated me every way he can. I don't know how many times, I lost count of. Finally he got up and left the room finally looking back. The only thing I could see of him in the lightness was his green eyes. I had no power to get up, no power to even moan for the pain I was in. I don't know for how much time I stayed there praying for someone to come there to help before I felt everything go blank before me.

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Thankyou.


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